Let me tell you a story…
Forward (Creative Process 0.0):
Ever hear a song on the radio or Pandora or XM or whatever gosh darn music listening device you might use these days and think, “Wow, I would love to use that in a movie soundtrack”? Believe it or not that’s pretty much all I think about when I listen to a few tracks. I’ve developed a strange compulsion to create movie scenes based around popular music. Some would probably call it daydream listening but I think neurosis is more applicable when it comes to the frequency with which I do this.
So I started compiling play lists of songs that fit together into a meaningful story line. Typically I would come up with a common thread or a general plot line and come up with scenes to flesh out that plot line to form… well… a movie script of sorts. No dialogue or scenes specs. Barely formed characterization, but at the end of the day these were audio scripts to movies that I would love to write someday. Yes I have done this more than once and no I have never actually created a movie of any meaningful length. That’s not to say I didn’t get my fifteen minutes of infamy. I got to play a killer with a hair fetish in a student film once. True story. Hair fetish. Gloves. I probably could have promoted the thing as Giallo if the music was progressive (does Macbeth by Cicone Youth count as prog?).
You be the judge:
I have seen the minds of my generation squandered and stripped down by video games and social networks. I’m sure somebody else said that and not just ripping off Ginsberg. There’s truth to it. We are a generation of some inaction and mostly misdirect best efforts. We can’t get out of our own ways to afford the projects that would be most meaningful to us the time of day. Well, I’m no different. You can write all the blogs you want and never really get a chance to feature something creative; something that brought your mind to the table and bargained for artistic process. I’m not writing this to offer a critique on the modern post-teen condition, but to offer up a bit of the meandering thought process that has lead me to want to write words to page and then have people read those words. This is an audio script I’ve been playing around with for quite awhile.
While there’s no dialogue, the story line is all but linear and the images have yet to enter the concrete mixer, there are some pretty gruesome songs and accompanying narrative to wrap around your mind’s eye. Maybe I’ll sit down and write this mother already and get it off my chest. You know I’ll never get the rights to any of these songs or have the money to pay for the rights to use these songs anyway. I’ll keep you updated, but if nothing else consider this a fun example of how songs might be used in horror cinema, eclectically. Did you see any of these coming? I mean, I listen to Cannibal Corpse too.
So this is the soundtrack to the horror movie I would make if I had a budget, could afford the unaffordable and actually put forth the effort to write a script. Some notes on the plot, the reason for using the song and perhaps where you may have seen these songs used before (and I assure you that the word homage is well within my vocab).
Think of this as the storyboard inspired by a campfire tale told by teenagers whose parents had a few too many cocktails and let this little tome slip out. It’s a legend. It’s not The Burning or Friday the 13th. It’s…
RUN, CHICKEN RUN (Working Title… because Link Wray started this whole thing shimmy shammying around and he deserves a nod)
Wait for the Rain – David Alexander Hess
Opening scene: The shot is of a roadside hotdog and hamburger joint. In this case the inspiration was The After on Rt. 206 in Flanders, NJ (henceforth referred to as the After with hope that they’d give me permission to shoot the façade and some interiors). Great fried food. Super retro without really knowing it. They have wagon wheels for friggin’ chandeliers. Wood paneling. This song would play as the sun went down, facing The After on an angle as the occasional car comes by. The neon lights on the sign light up and then eventual fade out. Yes, I used this song because of its inclusion in Last House on the Left, but it’s a different cut and not the minor key flourished Wait for the Rain you’re ultra familiar with. Also used in Cabin Fever. Fade out.
Promises – The Buzzcocks
It’s late afternoon in late spring/summer. A freshman baseball team wearing yellow uniforms out of the early 80’s has just won their game. Knee socks with yellow stripes on the socks. They are being treated to a ice cream/hot dogs… the works by the coach. You get a wide angle view of the place and are introduced to the protagonists behind the counter, behind the grill and patrons in the restaurant. Since it’s pretty obvious that this is a retro flick you’ll see plenty of early 80’s style dress, manor of speech etc. There’s at least one budding relationship between two of the characters and the baseball team are a bunch of perves who have more than a few things to say about the 80’s hot girls behind the counter. I imagine you’ll have at least one practical joke played on one of the staff by one of the baseball players. More on that once we get creative.
Outro (AKA: I’m a Fool to Want You) – M. Ward
After some back story, relationship building enter the make out scene behind the After. Kinda dirty, kind sweet and mostly a segue into discussing the guy in the chicken suit who’s been advertising fried chicken by walking around with a sign out front of the restaurant. It’s one of those moments where the female will say something like “I feel really bad for ____” and then male will go into the story he heard about how the guy in the chicken (whose face you have not seen) was the owner’s son who was horribly disfigured in a freak lye accident leaving him both physically and emotionally scarred. Since he’s the owners son and can’t take of himself he’s been given a job to earn him his keep. The chicken suit is very yellow. Somewhat dirty. Big wide eyes that seem to stare at you. Side note: it is my opinion that if you’re going to make a retro flick you better have either an overabundant use of organ music or acoustic guitar semi-surf.
Future/Sex/LoveSound – Justin Timberlake
This song probably looks just about as out of place as I think it does, right? Timberlake on a horror movie soundtrack? A. You can’t afford the rights. B. It’s a friggin sexy dance floor stomp… pop trash, right? Well the music behind it is the perfect tribute to John Carpenter. Bass driven simplicity with the occasional sparks of synth melody. That doesn’t mean its going to make the final cut of the movie, but this song has the ability to drive an action sequence (much like the upcoming transformation of the chicken man).
The chicken man has been outside in the semi-heat all day. He’s been staring at one girl behind the counter and she’s noticed. She’s even commented that he makes her feel creepy especially since she’s never seen him behind the mask. All her coworkers including an older gentleman who knows the chicken man quite well play down her fears but ultimately her fears are not quashed. The restaurant begins to close down. A few of the kids remain when a rebel type, James Dean wannabe pulls up in his beat up Camaro or Firebird and orders some food. This is the heart throb of one of the counter workers. Dialogue full of one liners ensues. There’s a brief encounter with the locale sheriff who reminds the kids that they better not cause any trouble.
As the staff begins to let their guard down for the night, talking with friends in the restaurant, our paranoid girl from earlier continues to feel the chicken man’s eyes on her. She turns to look for him as it is now nightfall and he has disappeared! This puts her off, but maybe his dad picked him up right? (wrong). She goes to the back to do some side work to discover… the chicken man.
Flesh and Blood – Johnny Cash
A buddy of mine put me on to this piece stating that I should use it in a horror flick someday. Well here it is.
As our paranoid lady friend walks into the back to do her side work she sees the chicken man standing there, full costume, still. Imagine a close of the staring eyes of the chicken suit. Juxtapose that with a close up of her body. The chicken man grabs her (think Leatherface in Texas Chainsaw Massacre right before the meat hook). She screams and screams but the white noise of machinery and closed kitchen doors keep the sound contained within the closed down kitchen. The chicken man attempts to have his way with her, but the suit makes it extremely difficult to maneuver and he ends up being pushed off her several times. It’s a sloppy fight sequence that ends with her on a stainless steel counter with a meat slicer at the end. The chicken man is on top of her attempting to rape her and when she hits him, he retaliates by turning on the slicer and carving her with it. Lots of blood sprayed at the camera.
Now you’ll most likely insert some creepy synth music as well as other original score surrounding some of these sequences but none more important than the synth swell when Flesh and Blood rings out.
Gimme Danger – The Stooges
At this point the girl who is infatuated with the rebel boy takes off with him to pick up smokes at the local convenient store (and beers for the whole crew) before it closes. They go inside, grab some smokes and beers come out and realize that the owner of the After’s white conversion fan is just within the streetlamp in the parking lot. Not seeing the owner of the After or his son anywhere, they go investigate and find what appears to be the deep fried face of somebody, assumed to be the owner. It is quite clear that the chicken man has gone crazy and they need to get back to the After pronto.
Supercruel – Monster Magnet
Cut to a scene of the After where the remaining friends, staff and customers are blissfully unaware of the murder in the back room, the death in the convenient store parking lot or what is about to happen to a few of them. The man in the chicken suit waits as one by a few of them come into the back room to look for their now deceased coworker. One of them is deep fried (ironically) by a chicken. Another has their face slapped against a flat top cook surface and then meets their end at the end of a meat tenderizer hammer. Supercruel begins the chicken man leaves the kitchen and enters the dining room immediately killing one of the baseball players with a baseball bat. It’s all laughs that turn into screams. There’s a mad dash to exit the restaurant before the chicken man can catch each of them and hurt them in some unknown way.
Run Chicken Run – Link Wray
This song is the source of the movie’s title and has a distinct runaway feeling (like the title suggests). As chaos ensues and the group gathers outside trying to figure out how they’d like to take down the chicken man or get help, they all realize that their cars have become burial grounds for bodies and have been rendered undriveable. Even the local sheriff who did a drive through earlier is found dead with his head in a chicken bucket in his lap.
Stuck Under My Shoe – The Dirt Bombs
After a few misadventures attempting to get back into the restaurant to save some of the group that made their way into the bathroom to protect them only to see them slaughtered, they realize there’s a tool shed with make shift weapons in it, and they have to take matters into their own hands. Enter a fight between the remaining members of the group vs. the chicken man (who’s freak strength is amazing). By this point you’d have about four members left. The rebel, the girl who loves him, one of the baseball players (the good one) and a girl who just might be young enough to consider dating the baseball player if they make it out of this mess alive. They go in with hedge clippers, shovel, pick axe and chainsaw blazing. What ensues is a battle of epic proportions where pieces of the chicken man’s suit are removed by the implements of destruction, the chainsaw runs out of gas and the chicken man’s mask is removed to reveal its actually the chicken man’s father doing the killing (he killed his own son to put him out of his misery and used the guise to try and his way with the staff forcefully. He was a loveable man but pretty flithy).. think Scooby Doo with more “Fuck You’s”. The chicken man/owner’s head is cut off by the sheers and he flops to the ground. Someone makes a snide remark about chicken’s running around with their heads cut off at which the final jump scare thrusts the owners body at the screen launching a gratuitous stream of blood dumping out of the blood stump. (I really want the guy to run around with his head cut off but alas Eli Roth beat me to it in Thanksgiving).
Fluff – Black Sabbath
This song is reserved for the cuddly; we survived moment at the end of the film when everyone thinks the whole debacle is over. The rebel and the counter girl kiss with bloodstained faces. The other counter girl gives a tug on the baseball players hat and says she’s gonna keep her eye on him in a flirtatious way. Everyone has a slight enjury but nothing they can’t handle. And just when you think it’s safe to pack up your popcorn, the camera settles in on a close up of the costume’s head… covered in blood and a hand reaches down, puts it on (street close from the neck down) and starts screaming like a chicken that’s being tortured that cuts immediately to black. You might assume that this is the son who wasn’t quite dead and ready for a sequel.
Wizards and Warriors – Mini-Bosses from the NES game
Credits
Prologue:
It’s the movie I’d make if movies didn’t cost nothin’ and assuming you could get the rights to all the music. I believe the correct terms is pipe dream? The point of this whole thing besides squeezing my brain for creative process is that there are some damn fine songs out their ripe for movie soundtracks. I had initially set out to give you my top ten favorite songs that I would use in a movie if I could a. get the rights and b. make a movie. Sometimes articles have a mind and agenda of their own as do songs.
None of the characters have been named to protect the reader from my poor naming conventions.
